Feral
by Tortured Hylian Soul
Summary: I could sometimes see that we could never replace what she had lost. The truth was that Aerith was haunted. Not by guilt, not even by all that she had lost in the fire. No, Aerith was haunted by a song... [AU. Threeshot. CloudXAerith]


Aerith had come to live with us when I was about thirteen or fourteen, just two days after her family had been killed in a fire that had destroyed her childhood home; a structure apparently unknown to the world that had long existed deep within the forest. Her mother and two younger sisters were gone within an instant, thrown into the belly of the inferno with no mercy. The tragedy not only had left her with severe mental scars that she chose to show to no one, but had also left horrible, painful burns etched onto her arms and neck forever.

Until she had arrived, I had been an only child, and had lost my father at a young age, (something that both she and I had shared), so I could easily expect that others would suspect me of jealous thoughts caused by my mother's attention towards her. But I thought not of that. All I could think of was selfish delight- delight for another's company in my secluded, lonely life, delight for her acceptance of my obvious lack of social skills and awkwardness, delight for having someone that would listen to my childish complaints. The only time jealousy had ever reared its ugly head was when her passing by in the market would turn the other boy's heads. She would always smile when I would unconsciously shorten the distance between us, glaring the others' looks into nonexistence.

Aerith was always very different from others, a difference that I never could truly figure out. Perhaps it was her strong connection to nature? Why animals loved and trusted her so I could not understand at the time. Then again, I think that even the most feral beast could be tamed by the tender, strange-yet-natural glow that she had always held in her eyes. "Aerith is… different," my mother would always explain with exhausted blue eyes, "Just respect her ways; respect her and she shall respect you."

I didn't (and still don't) believe that I could ever disregard Aerith…

You would probably think that my mother and I would have been good for Aerith, and in many ways, we were. We took her in when no one else would and showed her that she still could have a family, but I could sometimes see that we could never replace what she had lost.

The truth was that Aerith was haunted. Not by guilt, not even by all that she had lost in the fire. Perhaps an apparition of that kind would be a bit easier to understand.

No, Aerith was haunted by a song…

* * *

We were both curled closely together around the burning hearth, her on her knees as she read her untitled leather-bound novel, I leaning against a footstool with my legs wrapped together, trying hard to ignore the smooth skin of her exposed leg peeking out from her simple pink button-up dress.

My closed eyes snapped open when I had realized that the sound of turning pages had suddenly ceased. Not even noticing my reaction, Aerith stared deep into the flames, entranced. I felt a coldness grow in my chest as I thought of the possibility that the fire was resurrecting unwanted memories in her mind.

"Aerith?" I murmured questioningly, not knowing whether or not I should have been masking my concern. She continued to stare into the unknown until I began to timidly tap her shoulder, causing her to shake her head and blink violently as she returned to reality.

"Huh? …Oh, I'm sorry, Cloud…" She bit down on her lip, clearly embarrassed as she clumsily returned to staring at the pages of the novel.

I slowly lifted my hand off of her shoulder, suddenly engulfed with embarrassment as I finally noticed my unconscious caress. "… There's nothing to be sorry about…" I sighed, running my hand through my hair before staring into the dying flames. We needed more firewood.

I rose without a word, but there were numerous questions resting upon the tip of my tongue. Was she okay? Was there any way that I could comfort her? I shook my head before stepping into the kitchen, trying my best to ignore the clouds of smoke billowing from my mother's cooking. She had been providing charcoal-based diets for as long as I could remember.

"Cloud, is that you?" my mother's exhausted voice called from deep within the curtain of smoke. She was immediately before me, smiling slightly as she wiped perspiration from her brow. "Great. I need a strong pair of arms right now."

Before I had the chance to respond, a large bundle of soiled clothing was forced into my arms, several small articles of cloth falling to the floor. I sighed, bending forward to retrieve them only to have the majority of the clothing in my arms fall to the floor. Simultaneously sighing, both mother and I bent forward to pick them up.

That is when Aerith's wordless song began. I immediately froze, entranced by the melody as my mother stooped forward to place the items on the rickety homemade table. This wasn't the first time that Aerith had sung that song, and I knew that it would certainly not be the last. Those few notes seemed to express more sadness than I could ever know, but her entrancing voice gave off an air of comfort.

"What does it mean?" I whispered to no one in particular as I voiced my thoughts. I knew that Aerith was never with us whenever she sung that tune. I reluctantly noted that I had always selfishly resented her absence.

"Shh…" my mother gently advised, bringing a finger slowly to her lips. "It's her heritage, her past and memories. It's like a lullaby that she can only half remember."

I furrowed my brow, cautiously leaning backwards on my heels to peer at Aerith's huddled form before the fire. It certainly didn't sound like any lullaby that I had ever heard.

"Lullabies always stay with us even when we cannot fully remember them…" my mother added. For the first time, I noticed that there were shimmering tears collecting in her eyes. The song ended.

I sighed once more before starting towards the pile of clothing. I was stopped by my mother's arm. "Ignore the laundry. … It can be done tomorrow…" She brought a hand to her forehead. I immediately recognized what she was doing.

I hated seeing my mother cry.

I turned, trying my best to give her some privacy as I ran a hand through my hair in thought. I knew she had good reason to cry. My father had been dead for almost nine years now, and my elder brother, Zack, was determined to leave to join SOLDIER so that he could send some gil home, even after much protest from my mother. We didn't even know whether or not he was alive anymore…

I slowly turned back towards my mother, rather reluctantly taking a few steps forward before grasping her in a wordless embrace. She continued to sob into my shoulder as I took into account what I had just done. This was incredibly out of character for me.

We both continued to stand that way in a morbid attempt at comfort, how long it had lasted I could never recount. As her sobs slowly began to die away and become soft hiccupping chokes, she gently broke away from me, wiping at her eyes as if she was ashamed. "… I'm going to bed…" she murmured in a broken voice as she turned to douse the flames of the stove. Without a word, she turned to walk away.

Within moments, I was alone in the kitchen.

Sighing once more, I turned to Aerith's still form far off in the other room, making my way towards her as quietly as I could. Within seconds, I was kneeling at her side, watching her sleeping face. This was one of the first peaceful sleeps that she had had in a while. I drew a hand towards her shoulder to awaken her, but immediately drew it back as I realized that it would be horrible to awaken her from a rare peaceful sleep.

I stood once more to my full height, switching back and forth between looking at her and at the bedroom door at the peak of the stairs. I didn't want to wake her, but didn't want to leave her by herself. I thought with a blush of carrying her up the stairs, but knew that my clumsiness would immediately awaken her. Sighing, I finally decided what to do. Grasping a blanket from the nearby couch and laying it over Aerith, I laid flat next to her, my thoughts nagging at me until it was almost impossible to fall asleep.

* * *

Later into the night, Aerith had awoken to soon sob into the blanket.

I truly wanted to comfort her, to embrace her and tell her that everything was going to be okay, but couldn't, crippled by my own shyness. I couldn't comfort those around me, and I hated myself for it.

I found myself soon falling asleep to these thoughts and Aerith's choked-back sobs.

* * *

I awoke to no sunlight, but the smell of food sizzling in the frying pan told me that it was morning. I groggily pushed myself onto an elbow, blinking everything into sight as I noticed that the blanket wrapped around Aerith from the night before was now around me. The space beside me was empty and cold when I pressed a hand against it to help myself up. Ignoring my desire to return to sleep, I stumbled toward the kitchen, yawning.

I was surprised to find a splash of pink above the stove.

Aerith turned to smile. "Good morning, sleepy head!" she called cheerfully. I nodded back lamely, grimly recalling that she was sobbing miserably only hours before. She grinned and turned back towards the stove as if nothing was wrong. "Would you like some chocobo eggs?" I opened my mouth to respond, only to have my stomach growl rather loudly. I blushed as she chuckled lightheartedly. "I take that as a yes."

My attention was immediately turned towards the door as I heard someone tap against it. Groaning quietly, I took a step towards it, only to be stopped by Aerith's timid voice.

"…Cloud?" she murmured shyly. I turned towards her, grunting to let her know that I had heard her. Her smiling features were gone, overcome with sadness as she looked at the floor. "… Please don't be sad…" I gave her a questioning look. Had she heard my mother last night?

I immediately turned my attention back towards the door as I heard a louder knock, causing me to sprint towards it. When I opened it, I was greeted with a dark sky and a brunette man wearing a blue suit and a grim smile.

"Is this the Strife residence?" he asked. I closed off the space that the open door had created.

"Who wants to know?" The bitter smile had now shown a bit of amusement in it.

Before any other words could be exchanged, I felt someone gently push me off to the side. It was my mother, clad in a tattered robe, hair unkempt and eyes showing lack of sleep.

"Yes, this is the Strife residence. What is it you want?" she added not too kindly. I stole a quick glance back at the kitchen. Aerith was nowhere in sight. When I had turned back, the stranger was bowing his head, eyes closed.

"I am Reeve Tuesti, co-coordinator of the Shin-Ra sub-division SOLDIER…" He opened his eyes, failing to look up. "I am deeply sorry…"

* * *

I prodded the door shut softly, laying the box the stranger had given me on a nearby table before leaning against it, letting myself fall to the floor with my back pressed against the door and a hand over my eyes.

How long had it been since I had cried like this?

Had I ever cried like this?

I couldn't believe it. Those words continued to ring in my ears. This wasn't possible. It just could not be true. Zack was dead…

After the news had been delivered, my mother had immediately sprinted away from door and up the stairs into her room. I could still hear her crying from where I was…

My senses were immediately sharpened as I heard a creaking from the stairs. I looked up, choking back a sob as I tried to shield my ashamed face from seeing eyes. There was a blur of pink before it stopped before me, seating itself next to me.

"Please don't be sad…" Aerith repeated, looking down with shimmering eyes as she laid a hand on my shoulder.


End file.
